Forum: Close to Home

Topic: Do you have a real-life story of your own to share?

Six years ago, I found that just "working the program" was not enough. I became clinically depressed, my relationships were in a shambles and I could barely hold a job. I was doing everything right, according to the principles of the program, but I was miserable and hopeless. I returned to my therapist, telling her that for the first time I was willing to try medication for depression. I also thought that maybe I should get a psychiatric evaluation. My psychiatric evaluation indicated that I had problems with anxiety as well as depression. My diagnosis was uncomplicated posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

I had always known that my childhood was difficult, to say the least. At four years old, I lost my brother to a degenerative neuro-muscular disease and six months later my father died of alcoholism. Both my mother and step-father drank to excess when I was growing up, and our family home was torn by fighting, alienation, criticism and ridicule of one another. Al-Anon had helped me understand that the alcoholic home had affected me, but I couldn't understand why this history was so persistently a problem for me as an adult, decades after the original events had occurred.

Learning about PTSD has helped me enormously. Professional therapists who are trained in treating people with PTSD have been critical to my recovery. It turns out that many individuals with PTSD have had problems with substance abuse and many addicts have been diagnosed with PTSD -- particularly women. A recent review of research literature indicates that: "Women substance abusers, in particular, show high rates of this dual diagnosis (30% to 59%), most commonly deriving from a history of repetitive childhood physical and/or sexual assault" (Najavits, Weiss and Shaw: The American Journal on Addictions, June, 1997, volume 6, pages 273-283).

PTSD is more than just anxiety, or depression, or feeling stuck in old behaviors. There is effective treatment and I encourage anyone with questions about whether they may or may not have PTSD to seek a professional evaluation. PTSD is a complex condition, involving physical as well as psychological phenomena. I cannot overstress the importance of getting a professional diagnosis that includes a physical examination as well as a psychiatric history and evaluation, followed by treatment by therapists trained in traumatic stress studies.

There are a number of excellent web sites for information on PTSD. Here are a few, all of which contain links to other sites. Being well informed is very important.

National Center for PTSD
http://www.dartmouth.edu/dms/ptsd/Index.html

The International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies
http://www.istss.com

David Baldwin, Ph.D., Trauma Information Page
http://www.trauma-pages.com

Additionally, there is a great website for learning more about the combination of substance abuse and mental illness:

The Dual Diagnosis Website
http://www.erols.com/ksciacca

One last message, for women in particular: Please know that if you have a history of abuse and addiction, that you are not alone. It is possible that they may be connected. There is hope. Recovery is possible, but we can't do it alone. Chances are we will need all the help we can get -- professional and twelve-step. Fortunately, we are living in a time when this is understood and treatment is available. God bless and good luck.